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Musings of an Aunty Very Much Over 60

by Niranjana Mittal

Dolly Koghar hints at the bumps awaiting around the corner from 60.

By: Dolly Koghar

Along with the message wishing my daughter’s bestie her 60th, I sent a grimace emoji and quipped, “Life starts now.” She responded with, “Hahaha can’t agree with it,” to which I admitted that it was a nice lie. The harsh reality is that sixty ain’t the beginning to anything, but rather, a decline in the abilities and agilities that once were the norm.

Before I take you step by step down the challenges awaiting you, the sliver of cheer is that you are amongst the fortunate 11 out of a hundred who’ve reached 60, with only eight still standing to make it to 65. But statistics aren’t God, and you could become the wrinkled and furrowed face featured in the Guinness World Book of Records as the oldest living person, although you, yourself, might be too far gone to comprehend the hype.

After 60, firstly, the shot in the arm you got from the din and the chaos of a ‘shop-till-you-drop’ excursion, or from a drive to Ayutthaya or Pattaya for lunch followed by “I could have danced all night,” at a club, is from another lifetime. Now it’s the driver (if you can afford one) to pick up medicines or to the doctor, and Grab or Lazada for everything else, with the occasional B12 shots for energy boosts.

So, as a buddi, oldie, I’ll offer some tips which could’ve made my transition smoother from 60 to where I am now:

You’ll not bounce up and out of the sofa like before, now it’s a task heaving the derriere out of the indentation; it’ll need focus. So, switch off the TV; take a few deep breathes to synchronise the head, lungs, heart, arms, and legs. Awaken the spine by clasping your hands over your head and then stretching them towards the ceiling, pulling up the upper body and torso, then to loosen-up, arms still outstretched, twist the whole body side-to- side, smooth and easy. Before attempting to stand up, take another deep breath, command the bladder to wait, while you slide your butt forward a good six inches away from the sofa edge and then, slow-and-steady, stand-up and head towards the gusalkhana/loo. With this in mind, for your next car, opt for an SUV with wider and higher seats rather than a sedan; the more luxurious, the more difficult to climb in and out of, believe me!

If you’ve been a regular jogger and a fitness freak, keep it up, but no matter how many boot camps, detoxes, and diet programmes you adopt, it’s inevitable that the cool outfits you spent a bomb on will eventually look like they aren’t yours. But till that time, sweat it out in them, but do pay extra attention to the feet when you walk, jog or Zumba; you’ll have occasional bursts of the two- left-feet syndrome, making you prone to tripping over imaginary level differences and obstructions. Slow down all movements, even that of your hands, ‘cause you don’t want to drop things below what your spine will allow you to bend till.

The point I’m trying to make is that science predicts a maximum average healthy person’s lifespan as 83 for now, which amounts to just about 30,000 days. So, even if I do live that long, at my present age of 72, I’ve already blown most of it away, mostly in negativity and fear. Now, I’m supposedly left with 4,500 days at most, but you at 60 still have double those many days.

So, my sincere advice as one who’s been there, but didn’t do it right is: put aside a substantial amount for your own health and retirement home, and throw everything else out – anger, regret, retaliation, accumulation and competition. Although there’s absolutely nothing wrong with ambition and fun, the adage, “stop to smell the flowers,” wasn’t a frivolous, passing comment, but weighty advice to live each moment fully, abundantly and joyfully. None of us are here forever, but during this short sojourn, let’s not stick our heads into our mobiles, but rather, look up and out at the amazing creation that was meant for us, as the only thinking, understanding and perceiving species.

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