Is Being Delulu the Solulu — or a Silent Problem?

Most of us are familiar with terms like manifestation, law of attraction, vibrational alignment, subconscious programming and so on. These concepts were rooted in the 1800s–early 1900s but gained popularity in mid 2000s when the book The Secret was released.

However, in 2020, Gen Z rebranded this concept and named it "Delulu is the solulu" This phrase became a meme and also went viral on social media like TikTok. The concept of delulu is similar to the core idea of manifestation, but what's different is that people use it more in a playful way or as a survival mechanism when reality is not working in their favour.

The thing is, being a little delusional is not a bad thing; even top-level entrepreneurs and logical thinkers like Steve Jobs find that adopting a certain degree of a delusional mindset is necessary for success.

For Gen Z, especially, being "delulu" can be comforting and self-empowering as traditional life milestones feel harder to achieve in today’s unstable world. So they turn into hopeful thinking, which can make things seem less heavy, whether it is relationship confusion, sickness, money troubles, or just feeling lost.

Here's the thing, yes, being a little "delulu" can be emotionally uplifting, but the real question is to what extent is this healthy? Is there a limit to this kind of optimism, and can it become problematic when taken too far?

"Delulu" actually started in early 2010s K-pop fan circles, long before it became a viral meme. It was used to describe fans who convinced themselves their idol loved them back and ignored anything that said otherwise. At the time, the term was used mockingly, referring to situations where fantasy slipped into outright rejection of reality.

The meaning of the word began to shift during the COVID-19 pandemic. It wasn't an easy time for most people with uncertainty, job losses, anxiety, depression, and boredom, and to find some hope, people turned to the law of attraction, affirmations and TikTok trends.

Then what happened was, in 2022-2023, the phrase, delulu is the solulu" went mainstream, which in normal words means delusion is the solution. This phrase started to be viewed more in a positive light, with people using irrational beliefs as a coping mechanism when reality felt unbearable.

Basically, what started as a joke turned into something more serious. Finding emotional solace in being a little delusional is okay, but the problem occurs when people see it as a way to stay afloat without fully confronting what was broken.

In psychology, the term delusional refers to having beliefs that cannot be questioned or changed, even when there is clear evidence against them. Although many people treat “delulu” like a harmless daydream, others push it to the point where they ignore reality entirely.

Many people believe in the concept of faking it until you make it, and this actually works in many situations because it trains your brain to catch up to reality. Many self-help coaches also recommend this approach, as there is evidence of habit and self-image shifts.

So yes, being optimistic can be genuinely helpful and even boost confidence in situations like preparing for an interview, making rejection feel less personal, or encouraging someone to take healthy risks they might otherwise avoid.

Psychologically speaking, optimism often fuels motivation and helps people stay emotionally steady. When you believe something is possible, you’re less likely to give up. You show up with more confidence, prepare more thoroughly, and stay engaged.

What starts as mild delusion can become a feedback loop where belief pushes action and action reinforces belief.

When one is going through a difficult phase, hopeful thinking can also act as a temporary coping tool. Logic can sometimes make everything look bleak, and a little hope gives some emotional breathing room.

It doesn’t necessarily deny difficult feelings; rather, it helps people face reality when circumstances feel heavy.

Being delusional, however, has its limits. It starts becoming harmful when one completely denies reality and rejects feedback as warning signs.

For example, people can take “delulu” to an extreme level where they try to convert every experience into forced optimism. They end up failing to address real problems, avoiding difficult conversations, suppressing uncomfortable emotions, and relying on vague faith rather than concrete effort. This is also known as toxic positivity.

What happens is that, over time, this mindset gradually disconnects them from reality. And when the truth finally hits, what started as optimism can turn into disappointment, confusion, and even betrayal.

Relationships are one of the most common spaces where people fall into the “delulu” trap. For example, someone may start believing that the other person secretly likes them or cares about them, despite clear signals of disinterest.

Another example is of someone who chooses to remain in an unhappy, toxic or even abusive relationship, thinking every cloud has a silver lining. They keep convincing themselves that everything is fine instead of doing a reality check and confronting the issue. Gradually, this attitude can put people in a state of emotional limbo from which they cannot escape.

There is a lot of content out there ( often labelled as self-help) giving unhealthy real-life-guidance. And the sad part is that many people fall for it. These contents often repeat the idea that if you keep persisting long enough, believe hard enough, or never give up, love will eventually be rewarded.

I remember coming across a YouTube channel where a law of attraction coach told their audience to keep affirming that their “specific person” was already theirs. The advice was to ignore the present reality entirely and continue believing that the person was already your partner, trusting that reality would eventually catch up to the belief.

Advice like this can leave people confused. It makes them invest in situations that override their own dignity and intuition, which can lead to emotional exhaustion and erosion of self-worth.

The problem isn’t being optimistic; it'ss being out of touch with reality. What this really means is pairing hope with effort, dreams with accountability, and fantasy with regular reality check-ins. Being “responsibly delulu” basically means aligning your delusions with reality.

Being optimistic means you understand that things could go wrong, and you’re emotionally prepared for that possibility. You’re not denying disappointment; you’re allowing room for it. That doesn’t invalidate or judge people who are struggling or feeling low. It acknowledges that life is unpredictable for everyone.

To remain grounded, one does not have to abandon hope. Sometimes, life can be overwhelming, and hope can be a strength, as long as hope is accompanied by action, awareness, and honesty.

When reality and optimism go side by side, that’s how you make "delulu the new solulu".