TikTok, Tik Tok. Parents, you are on the clock. Do your children have rules around social media or not? Masala explores the boundaries parents put in place to ensure safe and intentional usage of social media by their children.
In my opinion, children should not be able to access social media at all before the age of 18.
This is because their childhood should be preserved and celebrated outside of a virtual world as it is a space that is widely based on attention and approval of a larger, and occasionally anonymous, audience.
I do believe that social media has the potential to make a child feel less in control of their world as they lack the maturity to create boundaries for themselves.
This makes them more likely to be influenced by the opinions of strangers online. It also makes them vulnerable and susceptible to cyber bullying, body image issues, and so much more.
I haven’t made any changes to how I interact with social media as my children grow up.
As parents, we are role models who set examples and boundaries that our children can look up to and follow.
We should post what would be acceptable to post regardless of age and access content that most ages would be able to access.
I don’t constantly share parts of my life on social media to highlight the importance of privacy.
If my kids were to ever look at my account, they would only see selected family pictures and posts about topics we talk about at home or advocate publicly.
We have a ‘no phone’ policy when we are together as a family.
Whether it’s eating, watching a movie, just hanging out, or being in the same space when we’re all at home, we try not to be on our phones or tablets.
My daughter knows about TikTok and Instagram. She may ask me about it from time to time, but she knows that she will only get access when she is 18 years old.
In a perfect world, I think there should be no access to social media ever.
Since that can’t happen, and I can’t predict what the future holds, I just want to delay it as much as possible for my child.
18 is the ideal age as that is the arbitrary boundary given for adulthood, and it makes me feel better that my child will have a stronger sense of self and a baseline of maturity before she tackles the dopamine spikes and societal comparisons that come with social media.
I catch myself doomscrolling often. I am a victim of these dopamine spikes myself.
Of course, I don’t want it to interfere with quality couple time and family time, so I make a conscious effort to put my phone away.
I win some, I lose some. Reflecting on this now will hopefully steer me towards more wins.
It takes two to tango.
A large part of why I doomscroll during couple time or family time is because my husband is more addicted to doomscrolling than I am.
I think I am against social media because of how it has impacted my own relationship. It has grown into a pet peeve of mine.
My daughter subconsciously observes this behaviour and I don’t want her thinking that this is healthy and how people should be interacting with the world around them.
I wouldn’t want her to accept this behaviour as a beige flag, especially from someone she values.
Although I try to enforce rules, I tend to become the ‘bad’ cop. I am afraid that I am losing this battle.
Kids don’t automatically know how to handle social media. It is something they’ll learn over time.
Without boundaries, they may easily come across things that confuse them, upset them, or shape how they see themselves in unhealthy ways.
I try not to doomscroll in front of them, but it does happen sometimes.
When I become aware of it, I make a conscious decision to step away from the phone.
When my children become aware of it, they ask why I can be on social media but they can’t.
Right now, I am at the stage where I can dodge the question and change the topic.
In our home, even with games, my kids ask me before downloading anything because the gaming world can be pretty scary and unpredictable.
Simple limits like what they can watch and how long they spend online is not about being strict, it’s about keeping things safe and balanced.
When adults step in and guide them, it helps kids build better habits and understand what’s okay and what’s not in the online world.
My children are allowed YouTube Kids as I have deleted regular YouTube from their tablets.
They are allowed to watch videos and interact with the videos (i.e., YouTube Music) from time to time when I am around.
They are not allowed on Instagram.
It seems that social media is here to stay.
It is penetrating our families in different ways, and, parents, your kids are watching you, asking questions, and waiting for access.
Introspection of what your boundaries are, what your children’s boundaries should be, and how to enforce them practically in the home is the key to a healthy relationship with social media.
YouTube is considered a social media platform because users generate their own content, can like and share content, and can garner community-like support for material.
Australia imposed a law that bans children who are 16 years old and under from holding social media accounts—a first-of-its-kind official acknowledgement of the harsh consequences for children.